Mr David Marriott is the chairman of the hotel company that bears his family’s name and on the 2023 Tour of the Americas, when we’re not staying in boutique hotels, we’re staying with Dave. His rooms have something memorable, whether in the US or Canada, in that the toilet seats are low to the floor. This saves millions in corporate bongo bucks, but results in two baleful effects for guests, one male readers will instantly grasp what with the high water level in the bowl and all. The other is you have to exert meaningful effort to launch yourself off the can. Dave says this is part of his big Stay Fit/Stay Healthy/Stay Marriott Program. Our suite at the Delta Hotel, Dave’s property in Sault Ste Marie, was across from the Presidential Suite, so I asked Manager Rachelle Anderson how many actual presidents have occupied the room. She had to inquire up the food chain and discovered there was only one. It was the President of Algoma Central Inc, the firm that owned the hostelry before Dave, but nobody remembers the guy’s name and she was sorry about that. They’re about to renovate and are going to change the suite’s name, but Rachelle doesn’t know to what and she’s sorry about that too. After an eight-hour journey across the trans-Canadian highway, my wife and I are in Ottawa tonight, the nation’s capital, and I would now like to discuss the time I addressed the nation’s Parliament.
© 2024 John Oliver
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