At 18.23 hrs GMT today, I willfully and with malice aforethought violated the Trading with the Enemy Act, a 1917 US law that forbids Americans from doing business with nations deemed by the United States as, well, enemies. I am in this a recidivist, a repeat offender, and I have been for years. Get popped for this and you spend grueling hours with the US Customs Service every time you enter the Republic from a foreign land. Years ago, I was warned about my criminal ways by a kindhearted Customs official. “You really don’t want to mess with us. We’ll make your life extremely very unpleasant,” he advised. “I mean real unpleasant,” he emphasized grimly. What illicit substance compels an otherwise law abiding citizen like me to put his very freedom at risk? What exactly is so irresistible, you wonder?
© 2024 John Oliver
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