On a radio call-in show, when you remind listeners who the guests are, it’s called the “re-establish”. Here at LoucheLife, we’ve had the recent - and happy - addition of new subscribers, but I won’t inflict a complete re-establish of staff here at New Bellevue House on everybody, apart from one, my trusted valet/butler, Finial Pádraig Horan. He was my subaltern when I commanded a regiment of Sappers during the Suez Crisis and one dashedly muggy night, he saved my life. He’s been in my employ ever since. Anyway, he fancies himself a proper sommelier, a fiction I countenance. Last evening, for example, he chose a 2014 Chateau Beychevelle for the family dinner. It being Christmas, I didn’t object, but instead allowed the ridiculously jejune claret to be served. My pedantic nephew, Niven, who’s ABD at the University of Edinburgh, gave me a postprandial earful, I can tell you. Today, a greater contre temps occurred.
For Boxing Day this morning, I gave Finial and his termagant wife, Margaret Mary Siobhan, the cook, a perfectly charmant item for the servants’s loo, this in recognition of their toil throughout the previous 12 months.
Strangely, their smiles were wan by way of thanks. I find the Irish often inscrutable, as evidenced by their expressionless miens.
I confess I’m still undone by the wine selection. I’ve always loved Beychevelle and hated to see it have such a poor outing.
In the 1660s, the first Duke of Épernon had just become its owner. The reputation of this great French admiral was such that as boats passed in front of his estate, they’d lower their sails to show allegiance.
The mark of respect gave rise to the château’s emblem, a ship with a griffon-shaped prow; its name in Gascon, Bêcha vêla, meaning “baisse voile” (“lower the sails”), later became Beychevelle.
Finial was near tears when I required him to surrender his keys to the wine cellar. “It’s only temporary, old thing,” I assured him jovially.
Tonight, Niven’s choosing the wine. Let’s see how that self-important pillock measures up.
Finial deserves more than a toilet paper cozy after all his years of service. You couldn't also spring for matching waste basket/soap dish/lotion bottle/toothbrush holder?