At Clarence House everyday bang on 5, the Queen Mother was served a Dubonnet and gin cocktail. The palace butlers - famously loyal, attentive and to a man gay - were strict about this ritual and it went on for decades.
But one day, the drink did not arrive on time and, at 5:05, the Queen Mum rang the pantry, gently reminding staff to get a wiggle on. At 5:15, still no drink, so she rang again.
By 5:30, she was quite at the end of her tether.
She shouted into the telephone, “I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU QUEENS ARE DOING DOWN THERE, BUT THIS QUEEN WANTS HER GIN AND SHE WANTS IT IMMEDIATELY!!!”
And in two minutes, she had it. I so fervently want this story to be true.
And with that, I wish you and yours a very happy New Year. I further express the hope that your gin arrives at the appointed hour and you needn’t raise your voice to staff. We put up with so much in our soulless epoch.
Even if you are the Queen Mother, your instruction to be served at 5pm may not be followed with the respect it deserves. You might as well say "five-ish."
I have always found it is better to say, "I will have my Dubonnet and gin served at 5:07pm."
Around 5:06pm, you will hear them outside the door, one of them looking at his watch on his left wrist, his right hand poised ready to knock at the precise moment and to open the door when bidden; the other bearing the cocktail on a silver tray.
It works every time!
I miss the Queen Mum and her daughter Elizabeth II